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15 Aug WHAT next Britney Spears is facing new claims she had a topless lesbian fling in a hotel pool with her former assistant Shannon Funk.
Description:Poor Britney is really in a funk now. It'll be interesting to see how Kevin Federline tops this, though, or how Britney Spears responds. These have been enough to convince Kevin Federline that he, with nothing more than the royalties from the three albums he sold and the fee from that rubbishy insurance advert , is better placed to look after his children than Britney Spears. Never mind — Mother Nature has ensured that there'll always be a constant number of celebrity lesbians in the world so, as Angelina Jolie goes full-time hetero, Britney Spears is inducted into the world of being a gigantic lesbian. And Shannon Funk's testimony will be vitally important to the case against Britney Spears, because we all know that it's hard to keep an eye on your children if your head is always buried up a girl's chuff. This isn't the first time that Britney Spears has been hit with lesbian rumours , but it is the first time that Kevin Federline has brought the matter up in legal proceedings surrounding the well-being of his children as opposed to just standing around in his underwear all like "Oh hell yeah! Female monkeys, though — Britney's got her reputation to protect.